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Gottman Method of
Couples Therapy

 

What is Gottman Therapy?

Gottman Therapy is an evidence-based approach designed to assist in strengthening their relationships. It suggests that relationship conflicts can be classified into two types: those that can be resolved and those that are perpetual. Perpetual conflicts stem from deep-seated differences in or lifestyle preferences and are a constant aspect of the relationship. The therapy encourages couples to manage these ongoing, unresolvable conflicts rather than trying to eliminate or them. A therapist guides couples in acquiring the necessary skills and insights to navigate these challenges. Developed by clinician and researcher John Gottman, this therapy is grounded in his extensive research findings.

How does Gottman Therapy Work?

Gottman Therapy is an evidence-based approach designed to assist in strengthening their relationships. It suggests that relationship conflicts can be classified into two types: those that can be resolved and those that are perpetual. Perpetual conflicts stem from deep-seated differences in or lifestyle preferences and are a constant aspect of the relationship. The therapy encourages couples to manage these ongoing, unresolvable conflicts rather than trying to eliminate or them. A therapist guides couples in acquiring the necessary skills and insights to navigate these challenges. Developed by clinician and researcher John Gottman, this therapy is grounded in his extensive research findings.

How Can Gottman Therapy Help Us?

Gottman therapy aims to equip couples with the skills and tools necessary to navigate their ongoing challenges. It addresses specific relationship concerns such as recurring conflicts, ineffective communication, emotional disconnection, and issues related to intimacy, infidelity, finances, and parenting. This therapy is suitable for individuals at any stage of their relationship, regardless of their race, class, cultural background, or sexual orientation.

What Should We Expect from Gottman Therapy?

Therapy typically consists of a minimum of six sessions and will continue for anywhere from 3 months to a year depending on the couples individual challenges and goals. . Gottman Therapy starts with a comprehensive assessment of the relationship, which includes a joint session with the therapist, an indepth online assessment followed by individual sessions for each partner.  The therapist uses this initial assessment to offer feedback and collaboratively create a treatment plan. Once the plan is established, the couple engages in regular sessions focused on therapeutic interventions and exercises, guided by the framework of the Sound Relationship House, where each level corresponds to specific activities. Through this process, couples learn to transform negative conflict patterns into positive interactions.

When is Gottman Therapy Not Suitable?

For therapy to be successful, both partners in the relationship must be open to and participating. Couples should also apply the skills they acquire during sessions in their daily lives. Consequently, those unwilling to actively work on their relationship may not gain from the Gottman Method. Furthermore, Gottman therapy is not suitable for couples experiencing physical domestic violence; such situations should be by a domestic violence specialist, a shelter, or law enforcement.

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